What would your suit do?

I finally went to see Iron Man 3 last week (which was RAD & should be seen by all). One of my favourite images was of the large variety of suits Tony Stark had built during some sleepless nights. Inevitably though, it sparked post-cinema pub debate.

So now I put it to the web: if you could make an Iron Man suit that did anything, what would it do?

We’ve seen different versions throughout the Marvel universe both on screen & on the page since the character first appeared back in 1963, from the original grey & gold suits through to the stealth suit, War Machine, Hulkbuster armour & Prometheus armour. As the conversation went on, I realised that the suits that had been created (and doubtless will continue to be created) by the geniuses at Marvel were at a level I could never hope to achieve in my mind.

They would also be almost entirely useless to me. Having ablative armour that will protect me against parasitic alien life-forms would be cool, but ultimately not something I’m likely to need more than once in this lifetime. So what if we went the other way: the more mundane the suit the better. Skyscraper Window Cleaner suit would be practical & fun, whilst Disco Iron Man would take club nights by storm.

So here are the first few ideas we had. Let us know what suit you’d build.

Disco Suit

Mirror ball head
Disco lights throughout body
Extra smooth joints for extra smooth moves
Speakers throughout suit
Fishbowl shoes

Beach Buddy Suit

Sunscreen dispensers & applicators
Biodegradable parasols
Dispensable water aids
Personal floatation device
Bucket head (multiple layers)
Spade arms (multiple loads; can also be used as projectiles)
Towel dispenser
Shower/hose/hairdryer arms

Babysitter Suit

Instant bottle maker/warmer
Nappy changing device
Nappy disposal unit
Extra soft arms to rock babies to sleep
Complete with pre-programmed lullabies & bedtime stories (with character voices)

Skyscraper Window Cleaner Suit